Although 68 percent of families sit down for a meal together most nights, almost one in five (16 percent) stressed-out parents say that when they do, everyone is looking at a screen, whether that’s the television, an iPhone, tablet or games console.
In fact, the average family dinner table is home to as many as THREE separate screens, according to the report from Bupa – as parents complain the summer holidays increase their child’s screen time by 45 percent.
A resounding 83 percent of the 2,000 parents surveyed, would like to ban tech at the table, yet just 13 percent have taken steps to actually do so.
52 percent feel more conversations over dinner would be good for everyone’s mental health – and 21 percent wish their children would talk to them about their feelings over mealtimes.
And the report shows as many as one in ten (12 percent) parents feel the summer holidays make it even harder to have real conversations, especially at the dinner table, while 80 percent would love to talk more with their family about everyone’s days.
Yet seven in ten (70 percent) admit to using screens as a crutch to get them through mealtimes, with 63 percent of children watching children’s TV at the table, 39 percent regularly looking at YouTube or cartoons – and 16 percent playing games or looking at TikTok on a phone or tablet.
Whereas teenagers are most likely to be scrolling TikTok at dinner (42 percent), using Snapchat (27 percent), or watching episodes (41 percent) at dinner times.
While mums and dads admit to chatting to friends on text or WhatsApp (64 percent), scrolling Facebook (40 percent), looking at work emails (32 percent), or online shopping (30 percent).
So it’s no surprise that with all these distractions, over half (56 percent) of parents confess that they struggle to get anything out of their children over dinner, with 59 percent saying that when they do it usually leads to a row.
21 percent of parents say that when they do try and talk to their children about feelings they immediately look down at their phone, with 17 percent shutting them down and 11 percent shouting at them.
One in five (20 percent) admit that their youngsters have no idea how to talk about their feelings or mental health, leaving 14 percent of mums and dads not even attempting to discuss emotions.
A tenth (eight percent) don’t know where to start when talking about subjects like mental health.
To help families get started on conversations at mealtimes, Bupa has launched new colouring-in tablemats designed to encourage mindfulness and spark conversations around mental health.
Dr Elizabeth Rogers, Associate Clinical Director at Bupa Health Clinics, said,
“It’s clear from the research that parents really want to help their children open up and chat to them about their mental health and wellbeing, and sometimes it’s hard to get away from screens to have those conversations. Whether you’re eating at the dinner table or on laps in the living room, being together at mealtimes is a great opportunity to make space for conversations about your family’s mental health.”
Over a third (36 percent) wish they could sit down to eat together with the family more often, as they believe that nothing beats a family dinner (29 percent) and eating together is a good time to talk (28 percent).
Harry Judd is an ambassador for Bupa’s family mental health campaign, The Bupa Table, which encourages real families to put it all on the table and have a chance to open up and support each other through honest conversations.
Harry said,
“As a parent I know the challenges of initiating those conversations about mental health and recognise that there isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution to getting someone to talk about their struggles.
“No one should ever feel like they have to suffer in silence, which is why it’s vital for me and my family to create that supportive space, helping my kids to understand that there is always time for us to talk, listen and check in with how everyone is feeling. It’s about being present and making sure they know they can come to me whenever they’re ready.
“Mindfulness is something my family practice regularly, it’s important to remember that it’s just as essential for children as for adults. Bupa’s new tablemats are a great way to weave mindfulness and open conversations into our day-to-day, like at mealtimes, showing kids that their thoughts and feelings matter and that speaking about our emotional well-being is a natural part of everyday life.”
The tablemats and accompanying conversation prompts can be printed at home at Bupa.co.uk/familymatters.
